Shipwrecked

The good news is I passed. I went down to the school offices to find out, and I only wanted to know if I passed. Most people found it odd that I didn't want to know my score as well, so I'll try to explain.

I put a lot of pressure on myself because I know I hate memorization, but I knew I had to get through this. I tried really hard to motivate myself to study well for this exam. The sad fact is I think I spent more time pushing myself to study than I actually was able to memorize.

As a result I had two major worries. The first being passing. The second being my score. I got the first one out of the way yesterday, and I emailed everyone with the good news. I got the congratulations from my family, but of course the rents tried to pry into scores, means, class average, national average, etc etc. I didn't know the answers and I was happy not knowing because this meant that we (THEY) could relish in my passing victory.

Today I got my score... and it wasn't stellar. I can kiss the ROAD to happiness goodbye. R.O.A.D= radiology, ophthamology, anethesiology, dermatology. This is going to dissapoint my family. My mother's dream is for me to go into radiology and match at her hospital so we can wreak havoc together. My dad's dream is for me to make buckets of money.

My dream?

My dream doesn't really have anything to do with medicine. My dream is to work out until I've sculpted a diesel body. My dream is to have the cutest dresses, including the entire line of Diane Von Furstenburg. My dream is to live on the top floor of a high-rise, where the elevator opens into the hall of wine. My dream is to travel the world, visiting vineyards and filling that hall of wine.

My dream is just a dream.

So as I come back down to reality, I realize I have a few emails to send. One to the chief of genetics asking if my score is even worthy of her program. The second to a recent graduate who "claims" he didn't do well on the boards. The third... I dunno. I don't really know to whom I can talk. Who would really understand how I feel, other than people stranded on my same life boat. Who would admit that they are in my boat?