Soft... again

AccountExec and I continue to see each other. Last week we went out for a nice dinner, but work has been exhausting and I was too tired to hook up.

I felt badly, but promptly made plans to head up to Boulder again. We went out for a great dinner at The Flagstaff. Sadly the winter storm obscured our view of Boulder below. Nonetheless, excellent meal and wine.

Afterwards we went back to his place, popped in a movie and started hooking up. He put on a condom, entered me and then promptly went soft.

A few posts ago he assured me it wasn't me. I chose to believe him. This time, I still don't think it's me. In fact, I knew all along that it was him. Though I didn't know why.

The following morning after we both shower and get ready for brunch he sits me down and tells me that it's psychological. His ex-girlfriend keeps calling him and telling him she's depressed and blah blah blah. It clearly was a serious relationship and he is trying to move on.

I wish I could say I understood what he is going through, but I've never been in love. I'm starting to think it's a good thing.

AccountExec wants to continue dating. And I think it's a good idea. Afterall... later that morning he bought me some very nice jewelry...

xoxo (Sorry I just started watching season 1 of Gossip Girl)

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Panic Attack!

AccountExec asked me last week if I was interested in having sex with him. I told him "of course!" but that I was unsure if he wanted to sleep with me. Up until last week, AccountExec had taken me out several times. He paid for everything. Hell, he bought me $200 boots.

But never once did he make a move or seem interested when I made a move. Yes, I went in for kisses at the ends of date nights and got the slightly turned cheek. It was awkward, annoying, confusing... but why would a guy take me out often and pay for everything and NOT be interested?

So last week when he brought up sex, I was thrown completely off guard and told him I wasn't ready that night but I would be next time.

He promptly made plans for me to go to Boulder where he lives. He picked me up yesterday, took me to a nice Italian restaurant and then back to his place.

We popped in a movie, got cozy on the futon and then of course started making out and taking off clothes. Everything was going well until he put the condom on... and went soft.

He apologized, but we continued making out and going along with foreplay. He got hard, put a condom on and entered me... and went soft.

He apologized, and I suggested that since we're well oiled with booze that maybe we should try again in the morning. Come morning, he starts massaging my back. Things heat up. He gets a condom on... and goes soft.

Last night I though it was alcohol. This morning, I'm thinking it's me. He starts profusely apologizing. He assures me it's not me.

He tells me that it's because it's the first time with me and he is having panic attacks.

I tell him it's ok... I had to do this because on the inside I was dying of laughter. I have never had a guy tell me he gets panic attacks during sex.

Well after breakfast, and plenty of Boulder sites, he asked me if I would see him again. He assured me that it will get better and I should look at this as one of the funny moments in our relationship. And of course i will...

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I might be in Three relationships

So I have yet to tell you about AccountExec. I wanted to before, but I was afraid of jinxing things.

AccountExec is my sugar daddy. Yup! I finally have one and he's great! He's cute. He can hold decent conversation. He takes me out to great restaurants. He bought me $200 juicy couture winter boots... I look super cute.

Now AccountExec and I had talked everything through when we met a month ago, and *this* was going to be a standard SD/SB relationship with NSA, seeing each other a couple of times a month.

again it was going to be...

AccountExec likes to see me more often than not. He plans ahead for dates and checks in sporadically in between seeing each other. He calls me sweetie via email. He has definitely fallen for me.

It's probably my fault. We haven't had sex yet.

Though I enjoying hanging out with him, I don't think we're compatible relationship-wise. But of course with my bubbly nature, smiles and flirtatious tendencies, I have successfully seduced him... accidentally.

Speaking of the Art of Seduction, the Author is currently reading that book to help him with book sales. It was fun to read excerpts together the other day as we lounged around in our PJs bantering back and forth before tearing off each other's clothes. The Author may be getting closer, but still keeping his distance.

Southie, however, is not keeping any sort of distance. He wants to hang out all the time. He'll call me on a rainy day to tell me he's gonna drive me to work. He takes care of me. He tells his friends about me. He's the first guy I've ever dated that I look at think "damn he is HOT!"

I love all three of my men for various reasons... here's to hoping I can keep all three in check.

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