Rivalry Sex

Since the Sox killed the Yanks 9-2 last night, the winner is Jon. I am a sox fan and jon is a yankees fan... I love the rivalry sex.

But to make sure he truly deserves the win, I emailed a list of demands that must be met or I'd make other arrangements (ie: go with OleMiss).

1. Buy condoms. 

I'm a firm believer that if women pay for the pill, men should pay for the condoms.

2. No smoking.

Though I used to be a social smoker, I am now an asthmatic. Not being able to breath is the scariest thing I've experienced to date.

3. No motorcycle.

I may be an organ donor, but I secretly hate that I am.

Jon replied to my email saying that he would comply.

I told OleMiss that I couldn't stay with him. I lied and told him I was having issues with recommendations, which is true but obviously not the reason I can't shack up.

OleMiss asked if I'd stay a couple days after the Hamptons instead. Cute, but I start neuroradiology on monday and I have to figure out what that means before then.

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The Rivalry

Sam turns 30 on Saturday. She is the first woman I've ever known to be excited about turning 30. (Of course I'm not counting Jen Gardner's character in 13 going on 30)

In celebration, she planned a big weekend in the Hamptons. I'm going to be going and I cannot wait. First of all there is guaranteed debauchery. Second, I've always wanted to experience the glam Hamptons.

Third, I'm gonna spend a couple days in NYC before going.

Jon was the guy I wrote about in my first few posts of this blog. That was 3 years ago. He and I haven't talked much, but we emailed a bit in June. He emailed me last week to see if I was coming to NYC. I told him I'd be coming on Wednesday.

OleMiss and I have been FWBs forever. He hung me out to dry in June as he respectfully dealt with an exie who still wasn't over him. I told OleMiss I'd be coming to NYC on wednesday.

Jon is expecting me to stay with him... and of course stuff will happen.

OleMiss told me I could stay with him. I told him I prolly wouldn't be able to control myself if I stayed at his place. He told me he's hoping I won't control myself and is expecting me to stay with him.

I fantasize about Jon. Sex, sex and more sex.

I fantasize a little less about OleMiss... but mostly about a relationship.

I'm not sure what all this means, but I do know I have to make a decision tomorrow.

Jon or OleMiss.

I decided to rest my decision on the Sox/Yanks game. If the Sox win, I stay with Jon. If the Yankees win, I stay with OleMiss. The way this series is going, it looks like I'll be staying with OleMiss... but it's POURING right now in Boston... and I just saw lightning... I imagine there won't be a game at all.

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YAY!

ok scratch the depression... I think I might be bipolar because today I am ecstatic!

I spent about 3 hours yesterday re-writing my personal statement. I gave it to my advisor today and he LOVED it.

The doctor who forgot about writing my recommendation may be a little miffed but more at himself for forgetting.

I got a free lunch today and a free afternoon. Tonight I've got a date with RedSox and possibly some movie time with Gorilla.

YAY!

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Ugh...

I think I'm sinking deeper into depression. I met with my Radiology advisor today. Nicest guy ever... totally flaming. He read my personal statement, liked it... then told me to rewrite the whole thing.

I'm starting to freak out again because everyone tells me I must take step 2 of the boards. I must get 50 points higher than my step 1 score. This is not impossible, but it's certainly going to drain me... again.

One of the doctor's who agreed to write a recommendation for me a few months ago totally forgot he was supposed to do it. I'm not sure if he's mad at me for not checking in sooner, but I don't want to harrass people. Freakin fine lines... trying not to cross.

I'm trying to think positively. I'm going to rewrite my essay. I'm going to do a presentation next week for my current rotation. I'm going to go on lockdown in August and study my a$$ off for step 2... and hopefully... (using prayer and the Secret)... I will get an amazing score and get an awesome residency in a big city and never have to drive.

I hate driving.

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Maybe I should be a Dermatologist

so get this... i have acne.

I know people deal with this every day, but I have been pretty blessed with awesome skin for that past 27 years. My dad and sister have/had the worst skin. I've been relatively perfect.

All of a sudden about a month ago i notice a dark spot on my neck. It felt dry, but I freaked out about Kaposi's sarcoma and went to get an HIV test. I should probably get those results now that I think about it.

More smaller dark and dry spots kept showing up on my neck... and NOWHERE ELSE.

I wasn't using any new product. I didn't feel ill. I couldn't figure it out. I went to see my PCP today for my annual visit and he tells me that I have acne.

So now I'm on an acne med...

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Formal Writing

I don't know how many people know this, but I HATE writing... I'm not kidding.

I'm an engineer for pete's sake. I don't write or memorize. I calculate and do.

I love blogging, but it's totally different. Sure you might be judging me, but my future does NOT depend on what I write in this blog.

Basically I blog almost exactly the way I speak... plus what I'm actually thinking when I speak.

So this formal personal statement, personal essay... whatever the hell my residency application requires... takes me FOREVER.

And then it ends up being a piece of crap... and my only salvation is DruHil.

I once asked DruHil to proof-read a 5 sentence essay I wrote explaining why I wanted to study abroad in Paris. I thought it was pretty darn good... straightforward and succinct.

DruHil replied by email 3 minutes later with a one page essay explaining why I wanted to go to Paris. In that essay, my 5 sentences had been coherently scattered throughout.

To this day, I ask DruHil to help me out... and I just sent her TWO personal statements. One for pediatrics.... the other for radiology.

Thanks Dru! You got me to Paris... to med school... and i'm confident to Residency... and don't go anywhere because I've got fellowship to follow ;)

YOU ARE THE BEST!

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Sucked In

I started my new rotation on Monday, pediatric radiology. It was the compromise I reached with my mom since she desperately wants me to become a radiologist... and I like genetics.

Since Monday, I have had several radiologists sit me down and tell me why I need to go into radiology. The pediatric radiologist went on and on about how great pedi rads is and how there's a desperate need for pedi radiologists and how I would make bank in private practice.

The neuroradiologist told me how she was just like me... not a memorizer, engineer, etc... I would totally understand the brain and how it would look when diseased (let me tell you, I still don't know what a normal brain looks like on imaging).

And then there is O. O did his residency and fellowship at my mom's hospital. O tracks me down everyday with a new reason why I should do radiology. Yesterday was only day 3 and he dragged me around a cocktail party to introduce me to all the important department chairs and heads.... and the residency director.

I'll admit I'm getting sucked in. I may not get the patient contact I love as a radiologist, but I have seen some really cool cases. My favorite (yet painful for the patient) was the story of the kid who got testicular torsion after his friend chucked an onion at his package... and well... his balls twisted from the impact.

Ok reality check. I have kept my step 1 board score a secret because I'm embarrassed by it. I am tired of being judged by a number every four years. I know a major reason I have avoided radiology is because many hospitals have a cut off board score... and mine is way below it. I don't have the confidence in my application to get a residency in that field, so I found genetics... an up and coming field that will accept me because they "need" me more than I need them.

Last night I reached a new compromise with my mom. She will talk to the chief of the department and ask him what he thinks my chances are. If he says I may apply to my mom's hospital, I will and rank it first... but the rest of my applications are for genetics.

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