Therapeutic Homework

In the aftermath of our terrible weekend, both NotMexican and I had an emotionally drained week apart.

NotMexican went to see his therapist and he came out of it with a homework assignment for the both of us.

We had to take 1st Corinthians, Chapter 13, verses 4-7 and replace the word Love with our name and each other's name... and then discuss.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

It was an awesome exercise and great discussion. The best part is that we took it seriously and didn't take offense when talking about how one person felt about the other.

And that's why I know NotMexican and I will work.

We have incredibly mature adult conversation without getting defensive.

The question is... can our wonderful phone and email conversations happen IN PERSON?

That is our challenge and homework assignment from now onwards.

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Engaged too Soon

I've been struggling quite a bit lately with my relationship with NotMexican. While I thought we were back on track, I think we're just more at a standstill.

When apart, I miss him so much. We talk on the phone and tell each other we love and miss each other... then when we see each other, it's mediocre.

Our trip to Breckinridge last month was great because we actually spent quality time together. New Years was good, but maybe because he was still in pain from breaking his ribs in Breckinridge.

This time... I am writing from his computer in colorado... I am just not at all enthused.

I got off the plane Friday night, exhausted, but so excited to see him. I read an article about happiness and the wonders of a smile, so I was smiling and ready to hug him and kiss him.

He drove into arrival, and got out of the car and when he rounded the corner after opening the trunk... he looked angry.

My smile faded before he had a chance to see it. Immediately I thought, "oh crap, did I go to the wrong pick-up side again?"

That question was quickly answered, when annoyed, he asked "what side are you on?"

I apologized profusely, but bummed and then shut down.

I went straight to bed with hopes that the next day would be better. It started out well, but he had to go to work. I didn't get any studying in because I was dwelling on the night before. He came home and we watched an excellent but depressing show called Intervention.

We were supposed to go to dinner with one of his friends who cancelled. I just could not feel better.

We went to dinner and I just blew up at him. I am sick and tired of looking forward to an awesome weekend with MY FUTURE HUSBAND and having it be crappy.

We made up, but I'm still unhappy. I cannot wait to get back to Boston.

I think this may be the beginning of the end...

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Tell me about a stressful situation and how you handled it

Don't you hate these type of interview questions? Twisting something negative into a positive?

Well since I'm probably going to be asked this question when I transition from residency/fellowship to a real job, I've got the PERFECT ANSWER.

"well sir/mama... on more than one occasion there have been snow storms and winter weather alerts in the city of Boston. Since I happen to live across the street from the hospital, increased patient care and resident responsibilities are often bestowed upon me.

I handled these challenges and stressors with vigilence (LIE) and happiness (LIE). I saw the positive opportunities in leadership and peer-dependency (LIE). I also knew I could never abandon patients in times of needs (TRUTH).

I took the hippocratic oath and honor my vows to the death! (DRAMATIC PAUSE... maybe even draw a sword)

Thank you"

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Good Riddance 2010

Wonderful things happened in 2010. I got engaged. My sister got engaged. My cousin got married.

Terrible things happened in 2010. My baby cousin was the victim of Shaken Baby syndrome at daycare and is now permanently brain damaged. NotMexican and I struggled bigtime with our engagement and almost ended on several occasions... then he broke his ribs and punctured his lung while snowboarding.

There is plenty more, but I'll leave it at that.

I'm not the type to come up with new years resolutions. When I want something to change, I get started on it immediately.

And that is what I did towards the end of the year.

NotMexican and I went to see a therapist, together and now individually. Our relationship is back on track and hopefully on to bigger and better things.

I vowed to focus on work, which means I canceled Netflix and evaluated my study material and schedule.

Hopefully my future posts will involve more happiness and good fortune. I wish the same for all of you this year and for many to come!

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