Relationship Milestones... huh?

There are a lot of "milestones" that I don't get. I wasn't raised to think that these things are a big deal, but apparently they are. Here are my thoughts:

1. Taking the guy I'm dating to a wedding.
What is the big freakin deal? I'm not inviting him to a wedding to plant seeds of marriage in his mind. I'm inviting him because there is gonna be an open bar, and I'd like to guarantee the sex for the evening so that I can focus my time on drinking rather than flirting.

2. Having a toothbrush at his place.
This is not the next step in a relationship. This is not any step. I don't have any cavities, and I plan to keep things that way. I don't like bad breath. I hate carrying my toothbrush around.

3. Meeting his friends.
I tend to meet a guy's friends at the same time that I meet him... my guy is the winner.

4. Spending the night at his place.
umm... quite often the night I meet him or the second date. What? I've got needs.

5. Meeting his parents.
This one is ALWAYS his choice and his doing. I never get nervous. My education and my parents money pretty much guarantee they love me.